A MATTER OF "FACE"

Much has been made of the oriental concept of "face".

It is important to "save face". Doing certain things will give one great amount of "face".

As a foreigner trying to get by in Hong Kong or China, how important is it to play the game?

First, there is nothing mysterious or inscrutable about "face". We do the same thing in the west. We call it "one-upmanship".

Your neighbor buys a new Porsche while you're still driving your eight-year-old Honda Civic. He has gained face.

Your son graduates at the top of his school class while the neighbor's boy has to repeat a grade. Your family has gained face; the neighbors have lost.

You get a promotion in the company while a colleague is passed over. You gain face, he loses. Get the picture?

Now, there are two ways you can deal with the matter: you can take it very seriously and try to observe all the Chinese rules in matters of face. Get a limousine and a driver and a penthouse on The Peak. OR, simply behave in the ways you understand, treat people fairly, and let people accept you for the Chinese rules are pretty remote anyway.

Act naturally, be yourself, and (to quote a wise man), "To thine ownself be true."

However, even if you don't play the game. It's still important that you have some idea of what the rules are. Here are some important ones:

• Never cause anyone else to lose face; i.e. don't call attention to their mistakes in public, or criticize someone publicly. If you must criticize, do it privately;
• Control your temper. You lose points in the game if you show anger.
• Don't raise your voice; Be patient and considerate with subordinates, older people, those in menial jobs who serve you;
• Without calling attention to the fact (and thereby perhaps cause them to lose face), express your gratitude to employees, colleagues and business associates who have helped you. Have a party; invite them to dinner or an outing;
• Don't show off your possessions, your wealth (a rule more often breached than observed in Hong Kong by the Chinese nouveau riche)
• Settle outstanding debts on time, particularly before Chinese New Year.